What are resilient people made of, made of? Grit and nails and a spirit that never fails. Now, add to these a determination to overcome, to persevere, and a never “turn tail” mindset. They face life head-on.
Oh yes, they stand, even in the face of adversity.
Whether in little pails of pain or big buckets of loss, adversity is always unexpected and troubling, but trouble does not last always because it can be defeated with a warrior spirit like the one displayed by Frances Marie Stewart Parker, a working retired teacher who can calm a rowdy classroom in two minutes.
Ms. Parker endured hardship like a good soldier and then walked off the battlefield with the flag still waving in her hand. We honor her today for her strong spirit and her continued dedication to her teaching profession.
Born in Bulloch County in 1949 to farmer parents, George and Marie Stewart, Ms. Parker experienced firsthand strenuous, tedious farm life. Her many tasks included harvesting citrons, feeding livestock, hoeing peanuts, stringing tobacco, and pulling weeds, but she was never successful in picking cotton and chastisements did not change things.
Therefore, her mom, whom she feels taught her great life lessons, allowed Ms. Parker to stay home. Her duties included caring for the younger children, washing clothes, cleaning the house, and cooking. Today, she is an excellent cook. Many rave over her collard greens and stuffing, and don’t forget her delicious pound cakes.
Since she loves to host Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners, everyone gets a taste.
Growing up, she remembers playing Sunday softball with her hard-working siblings – Paulene, Almarita, George, Alfred, Shirley, William, and Hamilton – with all of them lavishing much love on their pet goat Maurice.
Being car-less for a while, going downtown Statesboro as a child was rare, but she still remembers getting that occasional Vandy’s sandwich from the side window.
Determined to fulfill her childhood dream of being a teacher or a nurse, she did it, choosing teaching because Aunt Vesta V. Oliver (her father’s sister) was a schoolteacher. Matriculating at Savannah State College (SSC, now University), she received her B.S. degree in elementary education with a minor in social science in 1972.
Relying on her own grit, she funded her education through loans (taking 10 years to repay them) and SSC work-study program, employed as the music professor’s secretary. She walked to work, no matter the weather. She also took summer courses at Georgia Southern College (now University). Trials help build resilience.
Initially, Ms. Parker taught for two years (1972-1974) in Waynesboro, Georgia, at Blake Elementary School.
Then, she taught from 1974 to 2004 at Willow Hill Elementary School in Portal, Georgia. Historically, she was the only Black educator on its faculty for many years.
Retiring after 32 years of teaching, today, at the young age of 76, she still works as a substitute teacher, holding lifetime certification. Her former jobs include working at Walmart (2001-2004), for Mary Williams Pre-K Day Care (2006-2010), and the Boys and Girls Club (20142016).
She has received several accolades, all attesting to her excellence. First, in 1994-1995, she received the Teacher of the Year Award from the Fox Ridge Afterschool Tutoring Prevention Center. Next, she received a plaque from Willow Hill in 1997-1998 for her “Hard Work” as a 4th grade teacher, and most notably, she was honored as a WTOC Top Teacher in 2004. However, she says that her greatest achievement is “supplying a safe and healthy home for my children.” She has been blessed to do “mostly everything I wanted to do,” which includes traveling to 34 of our 50 states.
Heartaches arise just to break us down, but
Ms. Parker never faltered. In 1972, she married the love of her life Lester Parker, Jr. (lovingly called Junior), but her happiness was short-lived. Sadly, in 1988, after only 16 years of marriage, tragedy hit. Her husband suddenly succumbed to kidney cancer, living only three months after his diagnosis. She was devastated, yet her greatest fear was raising her children by herself – 16-year-old son Mandrill and Japonica, her 6-year-old daughter.
In one fatal swoop, she became mom, dad, breadwinner, disciplinarian, child psychiatrist and prayer warrior overnight. She says that “the Lord made a way” for her to survive. Dispensing tough love, she raised her two children by not “sparing the rod,” but covering it with love and understanding.
Today, her loving son Mandrill is a successful long-distance truck driver.
Japonica, possessing a stellar work ethic like her dad, has several associate degrees in health science and childcare. Currently, she is gainfully employed and keeps the grands nearby.
Unfortunately, adversity did not leave her home. In 2010, she, too, was diagnosed with cancer, breast cancer, putting her family back into a tailspin. Her full story of recovery is another testament to what God can do because in 2016 she was diagnosed with breast cancer again, but this time it was a totally different strand.
Surprisingly, she was still able to work, stating that with her chemo she “had no bad side effects.”
Today, she is cancer-free, but her list of ailments includes gall bladder and two hip replacement surgeries. This is what resilient people are made of --bone and stone coupled with the perseverance to live on.
When life shot arrows at her, Ms. Parker just stayed behind God’s protective shield. She states that “He has brought me through.”
Having joined St. Mary’s Missionary Baptist Church at age 11, she has been an usher, a choir member, and today she is still there, serving on the Decorating Committee, a position where she excels, utilizing all her creative talents.
Her children declare this about her: She “always has our backs, no matter what, showing us the true meaning of unconditional love,” and Japonica goes on to say: “Ever since I can remember my mother has been the same caring, devoted, selfless, resilient, wise, and intuitive person she is today,” and this is why they love her “with everything in our being.”
Lifetime friend and retired teacher Gloria Riley Boney states that Ms. Parker is “a true kind-hearted friend who is always willing to lend a helping hand,” adding that she is a “dedicated educator, wanting the best for each and every student.”
Likewise, Ms. Parker wants her students to remember her as the “teacher who cared about their successes and wanted them to do their best.”
Having no philosophy of education, per se, she shares these words of wisdom: “Respect goes a long way.” “Think before you say something.” “It’s not what you say, but it’s how you say it.” Moreover, her advice to all new teachers is “Be firm and fair,” adding “Do not walk in trying to be their friends,” and lastly, “Do not rely so much on what you learn at college because you must find your own strategy.” Her classroom catch phrase is – “I don’t play the radio!”
Yes, wisdom comes with age and experience, and Ms. Parker has both. Her life is a testament to what resilience really looks like. In the face of adversity, she stood.
Believing in her God and relying on her own strength, she pulled her family through. Her children love her, her students respect her, and now we admire her. Ms. Parker, you are one in a million!